Wednesday, 9 May 2012
Blog 18: Every time you make a mistake with a guy, it’s just like eating McDonalds.
It’s May; holiday season is just around the corner; and it’s only a matter of weeks before I find myself on a beach, daring to bare all in a bikini.
It’s that time of year again when we all search frantically for the diet that makes you lose the most weight as quickly as possible, with minimal amount of effort and maximum sexy-on-the-shoreline consequences.
2 days ago I started a new diet called Paleo.
The plan is to eat ‘like a caveman’ for the next 30 days - Meat, eggs, nuts, fruit and lots of veg.
We’re only 48 hours in and already I find myself dreaming about my 350-calorific hot chocolate with whipped cream on top!
So how does dieting tie into dating? I hear you ask.
Because I think there is an important dating lesson in here.
How many of you have tried to lose weight?
When was the last time you clicked on a Victoria Secrets article on the Daily Mail for envious thinspiration?
How many times have you tried the latest dieting craze, only to stumble at day number 2?
The truth is, it’s damn hard to diet.
Dieting takes a lot of effort. It’s a daily grind.
Personally, I have to try really hard to resist the 3pm urge to stuff my face with chocolate (which, rather inconveniently, doesn’t fit in with the current ‘Paleo’ plan)
Unfortunately, for most of us, in order to shed the pounds you have to apply some self-discipline.
You have to say “NO” to McDonald’s and wine, and start saying “YES” to that 30 minute gym programme.
You can’t just wake up one day, say “I think I want to be skinny” and just expect it to just happen.
So, what on earth does this have to do with dating?
Well, in the same way, just like you do with dieting, you have to make good choices daily when it comes to dating.
You can’t just wake up one morning and wish yourself into a relationship.
You have to exercise self-discipline, just like you do with dieting.
How many times have you done something stupid, like invited a guy you just started seeing to spend the night at your place? Or got a drunk text and sent him a sext back, even though he hasn’t called for 5 days? And how many times have you slept with an ex and immediately regretted it afterwards?
All these dating hiccups are just like diet slip-ups.
Every time you make a mistake with a guy, it’s just like eating a McDonalds.
It tastes great at the time, but leaves an awful sick lethargic feeling.
Of course, you can say “I shouldn’t have done that” a million times, and if dating was like dieting, you would be able to physically see the effects of your lack of will power.
You’d look down one day and realize that you can no longer see your feet.
You’d realise that you have not only failed to lose weight, but you have actually gained more baggage than when you first started.
But when it comes to dating, sadly it isn’t that easy.
You can’t see the number creeping up on the heartbreak-scales.
You can’t see the damage you are doing by not disciplining yourself to make good choices.
In fact, sometimes, you don’t even take responsibility for those mistakes.
Instead you blame men for their “lack of commitment”, or you blame “his ex”, or “your picky nature”.
Sometimes you know all the rules of the dating game. You know better than to sleep with a guy on the first date.
But somehow, when something looks good, you have trouble sticking with the program.
Remember if you want to lose weight you have to make tough decisions.
Even though you want to order the triple chocolate gateau, you get the fruit salad instead.
Even though you want to sloth on the couch at the end of the day, you drag yourself to the gym.
Sooooo apply the same principles to dating….
Even though you want to take the hot guy who has been buying you drinks all night, back home for a coffee and snuggle, don’t do it!!! Go home, ON YOUR OWN!
And even though your ex just text saying how gorgeous you are and how sorry he is for dumping you, do not accept his apology and turn up at his door!
Do whatever is necessary to insert some discipline into your temptations.
If it feels like a recipe for disaster, then it probably is. No matter how much you want it.
Remember, it’ll just leave you feeling very disappointed and (overweight too I might add.)